Friday, August 10, 2012

Just Keep Swimming

Just Keep Swimming, swimming, swimming...
     This is the mantra that has been on my mind the past few weeks.  I love Dory from Finding Nemo.  For all her faults, she is fearless and persistent.  Surrounded by deep murky waters with unknown dangers, she doesn't give up.  Instead she hums a simple tune and keeps on swimming, trusting that everything will work out in the end.  And her courage and tenacity doesn't just help her own journey along, it also encourages Marlin to not give up hope.
     So often I find myself weary of waiting.  Waiting sucks!  There's really not a nicer way to describe it.  We would all like to have a smooth, easy journey to parenthood, but for most adoptive couples the journey is more like a swim upstream against the current.  There are disappointments, delays, and detours.  There are days when it seems like it will never happen.  There are days when hope is hard to find.  Those are the days we especially need to take a deep breath and keep on swimming.
     This is not a blind faith swim.  There are times when it is a good idea to change course.  Maybe it's time to revise your Dear Birthmother letter.  Maybe it's time to consider opening your profile more.  Maybe it's time to do some personal networking.  But maybe it's not.  Sometimes you've done everything you can do and it's just time to let go and trust.!  Those are words that are hard to put into action, but it can be done.  A few special adoptive moms on the IAC adoption forum are great at reminding me (and other waiting families)- It's not a matter of if we adopt; it's a matter of when we adopt!  The journey is hard, but it will all be worth it in the end.  We just have to keep on swimming.
     These days, I am trying to be more like Dory.  I'm trying to be fearless and persistent.  I'm trying to let go and trust.  I'm trying to keep things in perspective.  I'm trying to remember that when we do adopt, all the struggle will be oh so worth it!  And if I keep on swimming, maybe my courage will encourage someone to else to keep on swimming as well.